


Raylan's Jewish Boyfriend or Why Boyd hates the Jews

by Bethypgold



Category: Justified
Genre: Alternate Universe, Coming Out, Gay!Raylan, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, M/M, Pre-Canon, Unrequited Crush
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-10
Updated: 2016-07-07
Packaged: 2018-07-14 07:35:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,496
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7160303
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bethypgold/pseuds/Bethypgold
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Raylan leaves home, becomes a Deputy Marshal, and meets the love of his life, who happens to be Jewish.<br/>Raylan's story told through a series of phone calls and conversations.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Salt Lake City

**Author's Note:**

> This is the first fic I've ever written that's gone well enough to consider sharing with the internet. It is unbetaed.  
> I started wondering what might have motivated Boyd to become a white supremacist. I decided that it might be enough if he was in love with Raylan and found out that Raylan was seeing/dating/married to someone "unacceptable". This is the result.  
> This fic is also influenced by a wedding I went to recently. The happy couple had been together for twenty years and were finally able to legally marry. When they got together in the mid-90's, they told their families they were roommates. I decided, Raylan would have done something similar as a gay man in the 90's, which is when he left home.

Raylan honestly couldn't believe what his life had become. When he'd left Harlan at 19 years old, desperate and afraid, he'd never imagined he could be so content, so blissfully happy. So in love with the most wonderful man he'd ever known. He had met Winston at the Salt Lake City Pride Parade. Raylan had been skulking around the edges of the event, working up the courage to join in the festivities. He was stunned by the large happy crowd, almost overwhelmed at the idea that being gay didn't have to be the end of the world, when this man, this beautiful man with big brown eyes and a huge open smile approached him. Raylan had let himself be led into the throng, relax his guard a little and have some fun. He and Winston had been seeing each other ever since. 

Winston was from Kentucky, too. But it was a very different Kentucky than the place Raylan was from. Winston grew up in Lexington, in a middle class neighborhood. His parents were loving and kind. Winston had an older sister and brother, who both still lived close to home. The three kids had gotten along, for the most part, and cared for each other. The biggest difference was that Winston was Jewish. Raylan had certainly met Jewish people since he left home but never any from Kentucky. But that hardly mattered. From the first moment they met, Raylan and Winston felt a connection that was undeniable. Raylan felt comfortable with Winston in a way he hadn't felt with anyone since before he realized exactly how he felt about Boyd Crowder.

And now Raylan and Winston had exchanged vows and rings in front of G-d and their friends, and Raylan had moved into Winston's apartment, which was nicer and big enough for the two of them. There was just one nasty task he had to take care of before he could relax. Raylan had to call Harlan. He sat on the couch next to Winston and stared at the phone. They'd been sitting there for a while. Winston gave him a little nudge with his knee and flashed him a bright reassuring smile. 

“It's going to be okay, Ray,” Winston said. “Are you sure you want me to stay? I can come back later if you want some privacy for this.”

“No, don't go. This is hard enough as it is,” Raylan answered, picking up the phone and dialing the number. He reached for Winston's hand and smoothed his thumb over the wide gold band on his finger as he listened to it ring. 

“Hello?” came a voice from the phone. Raylan closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

“Arlo,” Raylan stated, as pleasantly as he could, which wasn't very truth be told. He'd been hoping Mama would answer the phone. 

“What do you want?” Arlo demanded unpleasantly.

“I want to talk to Mama.”

“She's busy,” was the curt reply but Raylan could hear her in the background asking if it was him. He just kept quiet, knowing she would somehow end up with the phone in a minute if he was patient and didn't say anything. 

“Raylan, honey, it's so nice to hear from you,” came his Mama's sweet voice and Raylan allowed himself to relax marginally. Next to him, Winston also relaxed, sinking back into the couch with a sigh, placing a hand on Raylan's back for support. 

“Hi Mama. How are you?”

“I'm doing fine. Are you alright? You're not hurt, are you?”

“No, Mama, I'm fine. Work is fine. I'm calling because I moved and I want to give you my new address.”

“Where did you move? Are you back in Kentucky?”

“No, Mama, I'm still in Salt Lake, but I..” Raylan paused and glanced at Winston, “I moved into a new place with a new roommate.” Winston smiled tightly and rubbed soothing circles on Raylan's back. Raylan hurried on, “It's a nicer place, with parking, in a better part of town...” 

“That sounds nice, honey,” his Mama said.

“Yeah, it is. And I wanted you to know Winston, my roommate, might answer the phone if you call.” Raylan rushed on, gave his new address. Then he listened to his mother's news from home, answered her questions about any nice girls he might have met, reassured her that he was keeping well and that he'd call again soon. He ended the call and flopped back, falling into Winston's arms with a deep sigh. God, he hated calling his parents. He folded up his long legs to curl even deeper into Winston's embrace, tucking his head against Winston's chest and staying there for a long time.

“You did good, baby,” Winston murmured to the top of his head.

“I wish I didn't have to call you my roommate,” Raylan answered, pulling on Winston's hand so he could press a kiss to his wedding ring. He raised his head to look Winston in the eye. “God, I hate Kentucky,” he muttered as Winston laughed and leaned his forehead against Raylan's.

“You think I'm going to tell my parents anything different? They're not much more enlightened in Lexington.” Winston reached for the phone to call his own parents. Raylan listened as Winston talked to his mom, then his dad, telling them about his job and his new “roommate”, giving far more details about Raylan than Raylan had given his mother about Winston. They might not be so enlightened in Lexington, but it was clear how much both of Winston's parents loved him. Raylan couldn't remember ever having that kind of civil conversation with his own father and rarely had he been as open with his mother. It was nice seeing how family was supposed to work and Raylan was glad for Win. He was such a wonderful guy. Raylan loved him so much, couldn't believe they were going to spend the rest of their lives together. Raylan decided he would put his parents out of his mind and work on getting Win off the phone instead.


	2. Glynco

A couple of years later, Raylan and Winston were settling into their new home in Georgia. Raylan was not really looking forward to his new position teaching firearms at Glynco. He was pissed about being pulled from the field and sent across the country. At least, Winston had come with him. Winston hadn't even hesitated when Raylan told him about the transfer. Just asked when they would leave Salt Lake City and started making plans. It had been a long drive from Utah to Georgia but it had been a really good trip. Perhaps the best part had been the stop in Cincinnati to meet Winston's family. They had decided it was time to come out, since Winston was uprooting his life for Raylan and his family had to be wondering why. Raylan couldn't face making an actual stop in Kentucky, but Winston's sister lived in Cinci and that was close enough for the rest of the family. Winston introduced Raylan to his family and they explained their relationship. They were prepared to get out of there quickly if there had been any trouble but it had actually gone so well that they had stayed at Win's sister's for the night. There had been tears and laughter and so much love. Raylan had never felt so welcomed or accepted for who he was. Remembering that night in Cincinnati made his next task all the more difficult. It was time to call his mama and let her know that he'd been transferred. He was not looking forward to it. With a deep breath and a glass of whiskey for support, he picked up the phone and dialed.

“Hello?” Thank goodness, it wasn't Arlo, but...

“Aunt Helen?” He asked. “It's Raylan. How are you?”

“Oh Raylan! It is good to hear your voice, boy. I'm fine, fine. How are you?” 

“I'm fine, Aunt Helen. Just calling to talk to Mama. Is she there?”

“Sure, honey, she's here. Just a minute.” 

Aunt Helen must have set the phone down because Raylan heard a clunk, then voices from far away. He heard his aunt saying “Frances, Raylan's calling. You up for talking on the phone?” He couldn't hear his mother's answer and then Aunt Helen was back. 

“Raylan, honey, your mama's not feeling very well at the moment. Can we call you back later?” she said with a sigh.

“Sure, of course,” Raylan answered, wondering what was up. “I have a new number. I've been transferred to Georgia, to Glynco.”

“Georgia! Hot damn! That's practically next door. Your mama will be so happy to hear that.” Aunt Helen turned away from the phone again and Raylan heard her call out, “Frances, did you hear that? Raylan's been transferred to Georgia.” Again, he couldn't make out his mother's response and then Aunt Helen was back. 

“So when will you be able to come see us?”

“Uh, I don't know, Aunt Helen. It's still a long drive and I just got here.”

“Of course, you'll have to get settled and everything.” She paused a moment, then added with a laugh, “Maybe now you'll meet a nice Southern girl and settle down. No more of those odd Mormons.” Raylan pinched the bridge of his nose. What the hell would he do with a nice Southern girl? He tried not to think about Winston's dad's bear hugs or how his mom had patted him on the cheek and thanked him for bringing her son so much joy. 

“Right, well, I have to get to unpacking so let me give you my new number. Mama can call anytime.” 

 

A week later, Raylan and Winston were just cleaning up from lunch when the phone rang. Assuming it would be Winston's mother, who liked to call on Sunday, Winston answered the phone. 

“Hello?” Winston said with a smile, which slipped as he listened. 

"Yes, ma'am," he said, sounding wary. Raylan looked up from the dishwasher when Win didn't say anything else. He was listening with a puzzled look on his face. 

“No, ma'am,” he finally said. “I moved here, too.” There was a pause while he listened again.

“I think you need to talk to Raylan,” he said and he put his hand over the mouthpiece, looking up at Raylan with slightly wide eyes. “It's your mother,” he whispered. “She seems to think I'm here on vacation. Is that what you told her?”

“I haven't talked to her since we got here. I didn't mention you when I talked to Aunt Helen last week.” Raylan sagged against the counter and tried to figure out what to do. His mother was waiting on the phone. Winston looked apologetic and sympathetic. With the phone in one hand, he pulled Raylan into a one armed hug.

“Whatever you decide to tell her is fine with me, baby,” he said, “but maybe this is the opening you've been waiting for. I think you should try telling her the truth.” He gave Raylan a sweet kiss, handed him the phone and left the room. Raylan watched him go and then sat down at the kitchen table. He stared at the phone another moment before squaring his shoulders and lifting it to his ear. He could do this.

“Hi Mama,” he said.

“Hello Raylan,” She sounded tired somehow. “Aunt Helen told me about your move. She didn't mention that your roommate moved with you. I didn't know he works for the Marshals too.”

“He doesn't, Ma. He's an accountant.” Raylan knew he was going to tell but that didn't mean it was easy.

“Then why is he in Georgia? Does he have family there?” Oh, if only, that would be such an easy excuse.

“No, Mama, his family is in Lexington.” Raylan closed is eyes for a moment, took a fortifying breath and continued before she could make another guess. “Winston moved here with me. He's my partner, Mama. I... I'm gay.” And he stopped there, holding his breath, waiting for her reaction.

“Oh Raylan, Oh dear god.” Raylan heard her breathe in and out real quickly a few times. “Raylan, are you sure?” She sounded terrified, he thought, and sort of like she was going to throw up. 

“Yes, Mama, I'm sure,” he answered, totally flat, exhausted with the conversation already. He loved his mother and she loved him but she'd never been much of a support for him. Never could do much against Arlo, who bullied them both. He knew this was hard for her to hear just as it was for him to say.

“And Winston is – is, what, your boyfriend?” She still sounded panicked.

“He's my partner, like we're married.” Short sentences, Raylan thought, keep it short and maybe that would make it easier.

“Oh. Okay. You're “married”. How long have you been “married” to this boy?” She was starting to sound a little angry and Raylan didn't want that.

“Please, Mama, I know this is a surprise...” he started only to be cut off by his mother's harsh bark of laughter.

“A surprise he says. I'll say it's a goddamn surprise,” she bit out. “How did this happen? Couldn't you find a nice girl in Salt Lake City? Were the Mormons really that bad?”

“It didn't _happen_ in Salt Lake. I've always been this way. It's one of the reasons I left Harlan. I was scared to death someone would suspect and I didn't want to get killed.” 

“Always been this way,” she repeated, distantly, like she couldn't believe it.

“Yes, Mama, please understand. It's not something I can change. I tried to be normal, to be straight, but it didn't work. I love Winston, I love our life together. I'm not sorry I kept it from you. I had to. I wouldn't have been safe in Harlan and after I left I didn't think you would be able to accept it.”

“Well, you're probably right, I wouldn't know. You didn't give me a chance, did you?” She paused. “Now, I think I should go. But before I do, I called to tell you something and I'm going to say it.” She took a deep breath. “I have cancer. I couldn't talk the other day because I was sick from the chemo. Your Aunt Helen has been helping me when I need it.”

Raylan's mind went blank. He was rung out from telling his own secret. He had no idea what to say about hers.

“Good night, Raylan,” his mother said softly after a long moment had passed. The phone went dead. Raylan stared at it. He was really glad he was sitting down but he really wished the whiskey was closer. 

An hour later, Winston wandered back into the kitchen and found Raylan sitting at the table with his head in his hands. 

“What did you tell her?” he asked.

“Um... everything. I'm gay. I love you. We're married,” Raylan answered, without looking up. Winston sat down next to him, took his hand and tried to get Raylan to meet his eye.

“What did she say?” he prompted, gently squeezing Raylan's hand.

“She said she has cancer.” It came out in a whisper.

“Holy shit.”


	3. Alderson  and Miami

Boyd didn't really like when his brother came to see him in prison. Bowman rarely had anything to say that was worth the hassle. But he could hardly refuse to see him. Their daddy would not like it. So Boyd put up with it all and talked to his brother. Boyd's sentence wasn't so long, just 15 months. He was more than halfway through and seeing Bowman every other week broke up the monotony of prison life. This particular visit would prove to be more interesting than most. But Boyd didn't have any idea of that when he sat down opposite Bowman and picked up the phone. 

“Hey Bowman.”

“Hi Boyd. How's it going?”

“Same as usual. What's news?”

“Daddy's got a new project he's working on. Something for you when you're out.”

“Don't talk about that.” Boyd said sharply. Bowman was kind of an ass. Boyd didn't want to hear about after until after. Sheesh.

“Oh. Sorry.” Bowman looked contrite for a second. “Um... I did hear something interesting the other day from Arlo Givens.”

“This ought to be good. What did that old asshole have to say for himself?”

“Well, I was over his place, picking up a package, and there was this photo on the fridge. Looked like Raylan and a bunch of people at a party. Raylan had his arm around this gorgeous woman, all smiles and stuff. But get this, all the guys, even Raylan, were wearing those little Jew hats, you know?” Bowman gestured to the top of his head. Boyd nodded. “There was one of those candle holders, like you see at Christmas time? I asked Arlo about it and he said...” Bowman took a moment to look left and right, like someone might be listening in or to build up the drama for his little revelation. “He said Raylan had gotten hitched down in Georgia! To a Jew lady! Didn't even invite his old man, not that Arlo wouldda gone to a Jew wedding. Can you believe it?”

As a matter of fact, Boyd could not believe it. Well, he could certainly believe that Raylan would not have invited his father to his wedding. Arlo was an asshole and had never been any kind of daddy to Raylan. Boyd knew Arlo was half the reason Raylan had left Harlan, and with Raylan's mama dead, Boyd would be surprised if Raylan ever even called, let alone made any effort to see the man. No, what Boyd could not believe was that Raylan had gotten married. Full Stop. 

Back in his cell, Boyd could not stop thinking about Raylan with a wife. It seemed ridiculous. Didn't that boy know to whom he belonged? Boyd might not have seen Raylan since they worked that mine but that didn't mean he'd forgotten. There was no way Raylan could have forgotten either. Boyd had saved his life and that meant Boyd was responsible for him. The very thought made Boyd shiver. He just knew that Raylan would be back and Boyd was going to take care of him so good. Until then, Boyd was going to have to do something about the wife. The Jewess. Well, Boyd knew some fellas with some interesting body art who would be happy to help him with some creative solutions for that little wrinkle.

*************************************************************************************************  
*************************************************************************************************

Raylan had been excited about the transfer this time. Four years was a long time to do penance and though he'd actually enjoyed teaching firearms to new recruits, he had been excited for the chance to get back in the field, to do the job he'd signed up to do. When he was offered the position in Miami, he was thrilled. He almost said yes then and there. Winston, however, was not thrilled. He was happy in Georgia, had found a good job and built a good life there. He knew that Raylan enjoyed teaching and was honestly baffled that Raylan would give up that kind of security for the dangers of fieldwork. Winston had never said anything but it had been difficult for him in Salt Lake, when Raylan had been chasing fugitives. He had worried every time Raylan was late getting home or away on the job. Their time in Georgia had been peaceful and Winston couldn't imagine living with that stress again. 

But Raylan and Winston loved each other so they compromised. Raylan went ahead to Miami, found them a place to live and started working in the Miami office. Winston stayed behind to wrap up his life in Georgia and get used to the idea of Raylan working in the field again. They talked everyday and missed each other every night. They visited each other often at first. Sometimes Raylan flew to Georgia and sometimes Winston flew to Miami. A couple of times they met up along the North Florida coast, Raylan driving north and Winston going south until they met at some beach or other. One memorable weekend was spent at Disney World, Raylan's first visit to that magical place. It was good for about six months. But slowly, the distance began to wear them down. Raylan's stories started to feature more fugitives and more close shaves. Winston felt all his old fears creep up on him. Life in Georgia started to look better and better, even without Raylan. And when Winston put their house on the market, he met Gary Hawkins, Realtor, Dreamer, and all around Nice Guy who never chased bad guys or got shot at. That was it; the end of Raylan and Winston. 

Months later, Raylan was relaxing at home in Miami, enjoying a rare Saturday afternoon by himself. There had been so much to do to fully separate himself from Winston. There had been a couple trips back to Georgia to sort out who would get what and to pack up the house, visits to the bank and the lawyer to separate their assets and dissolve the durable power of attorney and the health care proxy and the co-tenancy agreement, plus he'd had to change his will. It had been months since Raylan could last remember having no urgent business on his days off. The game was on the tv, there was a cold beer on the table and Raylan was half asleep when the phone rang. Not expecting anyone, Raylan almost didn't answer but then the cell phone was right there.

“Hello?” he mumbled.

“Raylan? It's Aunt Helen.” 

“Oh. Hi Aunt Helen.” Raylan reluctantly pulled himself into a sitting position and reached for his beer. 

“Don't you “hi” me. Why didn't you tell us that you moved again? I called your old number and some strange man answered. I thought I'd dialed wrong, but no, Winston got on the phone then, said you moved almost a year ago and gave me this number.” She paused then, sort of expectantly, like Raylan owed her an explanation.

“Well, that was nice of him, I guess.” Was all Raylan could think to offer her.

“Nice? What the hell, Raylan!”

“Yeah, that's what I thought the first time Gary answered when I called. I guess Win was serious when he said he was in love.” All this was delivered with a sort of blankness that Raylan couldn't seem to shake.

“Raylan,” his aunt said, more kindly this time, “what is going on?”

“I finally got back to the field and it turns out Winston doesn't really like having a lawman for a partner. And he kind of likes Georgia more than he likes me at this point. Actually, what he really seems to like right now is that squirrelly realtor who sold our house.” Raylan tried not to sound as bitter as he felt, he liked the blank feeling better. He drank more of his beer. Aunt Helen seemed to be at a loss anyway.

“Anyway,” Raylan decided to continue, “I'm in Miami now, chasing fugitives again. You have my number, it's a cell phone. Was there something you wanted?”

“Well, yes.” Helen seemed to have got herself together again and was going to skip the condolences or whatever he might have expected for the end of the best six years of his life. “I was looking for you because I do have something to tell you.” She paused briefly, “Your daddy asked me to marry him and I said I would. I been living here since your mama died and it'll make things easier if we get hitched...”

Raylan didn't wait to hear what else Aunt Helen had to say on the subject. He just ended the call and drained his beer. He stumbled into the kitchen looking for a bottle of another sort. He'd probably pay, eventually, for hanging up on Aunt Helen, but he couldn't stand listening to her any longer. It was bad enough he'd had to think about Winston and that shithead realtor, but now to think about his asshole daddy getting another chance at marital happiness, too? It was just too much. Raylan filled his glass and set to with a determination, figuring he had all the next day to recover before he was expected back on the job. At least Miami provided plenty of distractions. Perhaps he would go out later and see how easily he could forget himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter is suppose to be Raylan and Boyd's meeting when Raylan is forced back to Kentucky. I am having some trouble deciding how that's going to go. That plus the start of summer vacation for my son is going to delay the next post. Hopefully it won't take too long. Thanks for reading.


	4. Kentucky

After six years in Miami, twenty years after leaving home, Raylan had been transferred to Kentucky, which had led to just about the worst year of his life. When he had driven out of Harlan at 19 years old, he had planned to never go back. God, he had even skipped his own mother's funeral, despite being relatively close at Glynco at the time. Raylan had never wanted to see his damn father again, had never wanted to see that house again. He knew there was no place for him there. 

Raylan had always found men attractive but mostly men on television or in the movies. He liked the action heroes, the strong manly men who he could safely admire for something other than their looks. He never looked twice at the men he knew, or the boys at school. Until Boyd. Boyd was something different, so intense and wild. Raylan had always noticed Boyd but working in the mine together had changed everything. Raylan had fallen hard. Boyd was pure joy when setting the explosives, he was big words and shining white teeth. He was the first thought in Raylan's morning, and the sound of his voice echoed in the darkness when Raylan closed his eyes at night. It had been that attraction, growing stronger every day, on top of his hatred for Arlo and how suffocated and trapped he'd felt that had driven Raylan to leave Kentucky.

In the early days after he left, Raylan had often wondered what Boyd was up to. Raylan had been so lonely on his own, trying desperately to make his own way. He imagined all kinds of futures for Boyd. He imagined Boyd taking over for his father, running guns and drugs through Kentucky, getting married, having kids. That one made Raylan cry, knowing Boyd could be much more than that. He imagined Boyd joining the army, struggling through basic training, never knowing when to keep his big mouth shut. Those thoughts made Raylan laugh. He imagined Boyd following after him, showing up at the door of Raylan's shitty apartment, pushing his way in and shoving Raylan up against the wall, pressing their bodies together, hip to hip, chest to chest, mouth to mouth. That one made Raylan hard. It was Raylan's favorite fantasy. He pulled it out and wrapped himself in it when the homesickness hit him hard. 

When Raylan found himself chasing after Boyd Crowder as a Deputy US Marshal, it seemed like a cruel joke. The boy he'd known was long gone, leaving a strange, bitter, hate filled man in his place. How unfair that Raylan had found the strength to leave and find a better life, fueled in part by Boyd himself, but Boyd had been consigned to a life that distorted all his vast potential into nothing. After a solid year of following the twisted trail of Boyd's rotten choices, Raylan finally saw the man locked up. Raylan was free to return to Miami but there was one more thing he had to do before he left Kentucky again.

“Hello Boyd,” Raylan said calmly, as Boyd settled across from him in the visiting booth at the Federal peniteniary. 

“Raylan! So good of you to come see me in my new place.” Boyd declared, gesturing expansively with one hand.

“I couldn't leave without saying goodbye.”

“You didn't have any trouble with that last time you left.”

“Well, a lot has changed.”

“You mean you're no longer in love with me.” Boyd smirked at Raylan's wide eyed stare.

“You knew about that?” Raylan stuttered in surprise.

“Oh Raylan. You've never been all that subtle.”

“Fine. Yes, you're right. I don't even like you one little bit anymore,” Raylan said with a smirk of his own.

“But you did. When we were in the mine together.” It wasn't a question but Raylan answered anyway.

“Yes. I liked you a whole lot. It's why I finally left.” 

“And without so much as a fare-thee-well.”

“I didn't know how to say good-bye to anyone,” Raylan said seriously, “Especially not you. Once I made up my mind to go, I had to just do it before I could change my mind. Just got in my truck and drove until I crossed the state line. It was the best goddamn thing I ever did.”

“I guess you owe me a thank you then as well as that good-bye,” Boyd said with a small smile.

“I suppose I do.” Raylan smiled a little himself. “Thank you Boyd for being so strangely compelling when we were 19 years old.”

“You're welcome, Raylan. It gives me great satisfaction that I played such a major role in your life.” Raylan just rolled his eyes at that. “I mean, without me, who knows where you might have ended up. Probably dead in a ditch.” Raylan laughed outright at that. It felt good to laugh with this man, after all they'd been through in the past year. Granted most of it was Boyd's fault, the crazy son of a bitch.

“You know, Boyd, I used to think about you a lot, after I left.” Boyd preened a bit at that. It was kind of strange to watch. “I would wonder what you were up to. Why didn't you ever leave Harlan?”

“I did leave. I joined the Army, but after Kuwait, all I wanted was to be home where things made sense. Besides, I knew you'd be back.” The smirk was back but it was different, lighter than before, more like when they were younger.

“Boyd, I was never coming back here.” Raylan said softly.

“Maybe that's what you thought, but here you are.” Raylan shrugged. There wasn't anything he could say to that so he changed the subject, something that had been bothering him since that first meeting in the church.

“So, you came home and took up with your Daddy. But he was never a skinhead. How the hell did you become a white supremacist?

“Hmm, well, you know how it can get in prison. It seemed like a good idea at the time. Bowman had just told me about your Jewish wife and I was feeling a little betrayed.”

“My what?” Raylan blinked in surprise.

“Your wife. Wasn't she Jewish?”

“Didn't we just talk about how I was in love with you and that's why I left Harlan? What would I want with a wife?" Raylan asked, incredulous.

“Oh. But Arlo used to talk about how your wife left you for the realtor and all that.” Boyd looked confused. 

“Arlo did? I bet he enjoyed that,” Raylan said ruefully. He scrubbed a hand across his face and through his hair. He thought for a moment, then admitted, “My ex-husband is Jewish. But what does that have to do with you and the Aryan Nation?”

Boyd's gaze took on a crazed quality that reminded Raylan of the night at Ava's when he was forced to shoot Boyd in the chest.

“You were supposed to be mine, Raylan. I was waiting for you to come back,” Boyd said very seriously, his voice sounding like it was coming from across a great distance. “If I couldn't have you, I wasn't about to sit by and let some Jew hold on to you.”

Raylan leaned back away from Boyd, considering him carefully. 

“So you got a giant goddamn swastika permanently inked on your arm,” he said slowly, voice full of anger, “because, what? You loved me? But I loved a Jew? So what was your big play? Were you going to blow up my husband? Then help me pick up the pieces when I came back to Kentucky all distraught?”

There was a tightness in Boyd's face that hadn't been there for much of their conversation. But once it was there, Raylan realized he recognized it from all their interactions in the past year. It reminded Raylan that this Boyd was not the Boyd he'd known in high school or in the mine. This Boyd had done unspeakable things in the name of hatred and greed. Raylan had wanted some answers, some closure before leaving town but he wasn't sure if he actually felt any better once he had them. The idea that his love had inadvertently spawned this hate made him slightly sick. 

Raylan stood up and looked down at Boyd, trying to see the boy he'd known once last time. He had gotten what he'd wanted. It was time for him to go.

“Good-bye, Boyd,” he said.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> well, I hope you like the ending. I wasn't sure I was going to be able to pull this thing together but I'm mostly satisfied. Thanks for reading.


End file.
